View Full Version : I broke the StairMuther tonight!
My leg is finally healed, dad is safe and sound at home, I have a stable day shift job.... it seems my life is calming down. So, it's time to hit the gym again. I have porked up a pound or two this winter and am bound and determined to get it off. I have been eating much healthier and the next step is getting back on the StairMuther.
The StairMuther and I have a long history of a love-hate relationship. About 10 years ago, I decided to get back in my 32's which meant I had to drop 30 pounds. So, 5 days a week, I hit the StairMuther. The bitch laughed at me when I walked in. It has eyes in. If you look hard enough, you can see them. Every one of those damn machines are possessed. I ate normal, just went religiously and visited the StairMuther. I lost my 30 pounds in 4 months and got back in my 32's (only to be told I looked like a concentration camp survivor!)
Anyway..... I walk in today all pumped up, hop on, put in my correct weight and start riding her like the bitch she is! I was 12 minutes in to and was sweating like a whore in church thinking about the 2nd coming and then it happened! SNAP! The frickin' cable to the right leg broke- snapped clean in two! It threw me backwards and I bumped into a fat lady on the tread mill behind me. Everyone stops and turns around. I bet I was 14 shades of red. The girl comes out and asks if I am hurt. I told her "yeah, my pride!" :(
WilliamJ
04-07-03, 09:13 PM
i hate i didn't see that.
builder
04-07-03, 09:40 PM
Originally posted by WilliamJ
i hate i didn't see that.
twice.
And I thought it was the orgasm I gave my wife that made the ground shake today. Turns out it was just a fat homo hitting the floor a hundred fifty miles away...
Originally posted by sadic1
And I thought it was the orgasm I gave my wife that made the ground shake today. Turns out it was just a fat homo hitting the floor a hundred fifty miles away...
...i just blew snot bubbles
builder
04-07-03, 10:06 PM
Originally posted by DaveW
...i just blew snot bubbles
this gives me wood.
I simply LOVE the way you tell a story Fred--I laugh out loud every time!!:laugher: :boune: :laugher:
Originally posted by Daisey
I simply LOVE the way you tell a story Fred--I laugh out loud every time!! It wasn't a story sweetie. It was the truth. I'm sure that Vision's on Tunnel Rd in Asheville will have the broken cable will be in a display case by tomorrow morning. It's the most action that's happened to that place, outside the sauna, in years!
Originally posted by Fred
It wasn't a story sweetie. It was the truth. I'm sure that Vision's on Tunnel Rd in Asheville will have the broken cable will be in a display case by tomorrow morning. It's the most action that's happened to that place, outside the sauna, in years!
Poor thing!--maybe no one will remember it was you!
builder
04-07-03, 11:17 PM
Originally posted by Daisey
Poor thing!--maybe no one will remember it was you!
Sweetheart...you've never seen Fred. you can't forget a 6'3 queer like him when he lumbers into the room dragging his knuckles.
Originally posted by builder
Sweetheart...you've never seen Fred. you can't forget a 6'3 queer like him when he lumbers into the room dragging his knuckles. :jawomg: Now that one hurt!
builder
04-07-03, 11:18 PM
Originally posted by Fred
Now that one hurt!
That's the first time I've ever heard you say those words.
Originally posted by builder
That's the first time I've ever heard you say those words.
ROTF!
I remember where you live bitch!
builder
04-07-03, 11:22 PM
Originally posted by Fred
I remember where you live bitch!
Maybe so...but I doubt you could find it.
Originally posted by builder
Maybe so...but I doubt you could find it.
Fred's got directions in the dash! :D
builder
04-07-03, 11:27 PM
Originally posted by Fred
Fred's got directions in the dash! :D
The same ones you got lost with last time? :cool:
Originally posted by builder
The same ones you got lost with last time? :cool:
:bird6:
builder
04-07-03, 11:30 PM
I WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Originally posted by builder
I WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
like hell you did! Do you actually think you could find my place again? even after being here multiple times? A big city boy like you?
builder
04-07-03, 11:33 PM
Off 240....just go up to the school and turn right at the church then left then down the hill..... Yeah. I can find it.
Originally posted by builder
Off 240....just go up to the school and turn right at the church then left then down the hill..... Yeah. I can find it.
I'll see next time you come up. :D
builder
04-07-03, 11:35 PM
I know those are wrong. I can find your house though. Hell, you're just off the paved street. If not, I'll just hop on the railroad track and get off when I see your back door.
too many rr's in the town. You could always look for the burnt out red light out front.
Originally posted by builder
I know those are wrong. no actually those were right.
builder
04-07-03, 11:40 PM
Originally posted by Fred
You could always look for the burnt out red light out front.
BLANCHE!!!!!!!!
builder
04-07-03, 11:47 PM
fucktwat. I know what you're trying to say.
Originally posted by builder
fucktwat. I know what you're trying to say.
Night baby.
I WIN!
builder
04-07-03, 11:48 PM
Sun don't shine on the same dog's ass every day...
Originally posted by builder
Sun don't shine on the same dog's ass every day... Putt has already chewed you a new one tonight. i was just trying to help you sharpen up on your skills.
builder
04-07-03, 11:52 PM
Originally posted by Fred
Putt has already chewed you a new one tonight.
:confused: I missed that one. I've been ignoring him like he axed.
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